179 – I Am One of Their Ascendants

The way I think, the way I speak, the way I breathe, the way I walk, the way I love, the way my body organizes itself, the way I understand and perceive reality, the way I produce energy to power my constant transformation, are all the result of the ongoing evolutionary process in which I am embedded. I am part of the ascent of an amazing species which, amid a propitious planetary period, has come to populate every inhabitable niche on Earth.

Through our ascent, the human brain developed the complex neuronal connectivity that endows me with a high degree of intelligence, a level of inquisitiveness rare in Nature, the ingenuity to adapt to changing environments, the awareness of my own awareness.

But the insecurity, fear, trauma, abuse of a dysfunctional upbringing, and the oppression of an educational system heavily tilted towards the control of the young, vulnerable mind stunted the development of my intelligence to be capable of understanding and perceiving the world beyond the limitations of my organic senses. The combination of these harmful factors forced my body to numb my feelings. The wisdom of Nature to halt the complete annihilation of my rebel mind allowed me to survive by feeling nothing, caring for nothing. It has taken me a lifetime to awaken my compassion and get my feelings back.

It is heartbreaking to realize that I am not an exemption, that the history of my upbringing is ‘normal’ in most cultures.

But the force of a legacy passed along in the lessons of flourishing civilizations, and the wisdom of great thinkers awoke in me an insatiable need to understand what I am; the search has helped me overcome the traumatic events of my upbringing.

I was born with the soul of a rebel, the hunger of a questing mind, and the capacity to perceive patterns that sustain Nature’s creative order. And so, I fought any form of ‘authority’ wanting to dictate how I think, live, love, and understand. I devoured books, especially those that opened my mind to new horizons and dared question the status quo. I also learned to love science, philosophy, poetry, and music, especially classical music, because it fed my uncanny capacity to perceive patterns of order and beauty out of the chaotic world we have created.

My rebelliousness, the hunger of my mind, and my capacity to perceive patterns in Nature have taken me, as someone said, to places I would not know how to get to; places where I have begun to understand my participation in the magnificent order and astonishing beauty of our Universe. Places where I came to see that I could not have attained a highly evolved level of perception without the heritage of innumerable generations of thinkers, lovers, dreamers, rebels, wanderers, visionaries, pioneers – the people who untiringly seek knowledge through the mysteries of the mind, the people who tenaciously want to unravel the Source that engenders the boundless creativity and beauty of the evolutionary process we call Life.

I am one of their ascendants.

Revised January 2021   

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2 Responses to “179 – I Am One of Their Ascendants”

  1. Mundo says:

    Such a beautiful comment, especially because it is coming from you.

  2. Colleen says:

    As always you make me think of my path before and now. Life is beautiful, so much to learn!

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